The Power of Acceptance: Supporting Mental Health and Quality of Life for Public Safety Personnel

Acceptance helps Public Safety Personnel build resilience by facing reality without judgment, reducing stress, and improving mental health.

Trillium Health Partners is a leading hospital system in Ontario, committed to delivering high-quality, patient-centered care through its three main sites: Credit Valley Hospital, Mississauga Hospital, and Queensway Health Centre.

This site offers immediate, stigma-free mental health resources for trauma-exposed public safety personnel (both uniform and civilian) in Ontario. Access confidential support 24/7 through free online resources or if in immediate crisis, call 911, Homewood Health’s 24/7 crisis line at 1-833-866-9929, or for 24/7 peer support call Boots on the Ground at 1-833-677-2668.

Equipping Public Safety Personnel (PSP) with tools for mental wellness and resilience is essential given the ongoing exposure to high-stress situations and high-stakes environments.

One of the most powerful, yet often misunderstood, tools for managing these challenges is acceptance. Learning to accept what we experience, rather than avoiding, suppressing, or fighting it, can significantly improve mental health and quality of life.

What Is Acceptance?

In the context of mental wellness, acceptance can be understood as the active process of acknowledging and allowing situations, thoughts, emotions, and experiences to be present without judgment.

Acceptance of external situations involves consciously and fully acknowledging the facts of a situation versus fixating on how or why it shouldn’t be that way. We may not like, want or agree with a situation, but accepting that it’s happening enables us to respond to the situation in more helpful ways.

Acceptance of internal experiences involves simply allowing our thoughts, emotions and bodily sensations to be as they are, regardless of whether they’re pleasant or painful. Acceptance involves opening up to and making room for our inner experiences instead of struggling with them, judging them or trying to stop them.

Acceptance does not mean resigning, condoning, or approving of suffering. It means making space for reality as it is, so you can choose how to respond rather than reacting impulsively or unconsciously. .

“People often confuse acceptance with submission or passivity. But acceptance is actually a highly proactive and intentional process of activating your own willingness to remain in reality. It takes incredible strength and dedication.”

-Dr. Dennis Tirch, PhD

Acceptance is evidence-based

Acceptance is the cornerstone of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), a therapeutic approach that helps people accept what is outside of their personal control and redirect their attention and energy to the things they can control: living in alignment with your values even when facing immense struggles.

Research has consistently linked the habitual tendency to accept one’s mental experiences with greater psychological health (Baer et al., 2004, Hayes et al., 2004).Individuals who accept challenging thoughts and feelings are less likely to ruminate, and rumination typically perpetuates undesirable emotional states (Ciesla et al., 2012). People who practice experiential acceptance are less likely to experience unpleasant meta-emotional reactions, such as feeling guilty about feeling angry, or feeling sad about feeling anxious.

Emotional suppression, versus acceptance, degrades memory. Compared to participants who actively accepted their emotions, participants who suppressed their emotions performed worse on memory tests (Richards & Gross, 2000). Emotional suppression is associated with clear increases in sympathetic (fight or flight) nervous system activation (Gross & Levenson, 1993).

Why Acceptance Matters for PSP

Reduces Emotional Pain: Fighting against thoughts like “I shouldn’t feel this way” or “I have to stay strong” adds an extra layer of stress. Accepting situations, thoughts and feelings removes that burden.

Promotes Resilience: Acknowledging the reality of tough emotions helps you move through them rather than getting stuck.

Improves Relationships: When you're less defensive about your own experiences and better able to accept the reality of situations, it’s easier to meaningfully connect with others.

Supports Long-Term Mental Health: Acceptance has been linked to lower levels of anxiety, depression, and substance use, and greater overall well-being.

Practical Tips to Foster Acceptance

Notice Without Judgment

When a difficult thought or feeling arises (e.g., guilt, fear, frustration), try saying: “This is what I’m feeling right now.” Noticing and naming our internal experiences can immediately reduce their intensity and help us accept their presence.

Practice the 4 A’s of Acceptance: Acknowledge, Allow, Accommodate, Appreciate

Acknowledge: Notice and name what’s happening, without judgement. What is the situation, thought, emotion, image, memory, physical sensation or urge.

Allow: simply allow the experience to be as it is, without trying to avoid, suppress, fight against it or get rid of it. Let it be. Gently remind yourself that fighting against what’s happening often makes things more intense and difficult to manage.

Accommodate: Open up and make room for the situation, thought or feeling. Breathe into it, give it plenty of space to freely come, go and stay on its own time. You don’t need to like, want or approve of it.

Appreciate: Even the most painful emotions and difficult situations can offer us wisdom or teach us valuable lessons. Take a different perspective. Can you see your emotion as an ally? What might it be trying to tell you? What is it motivating you to do? What is it protecting us from? Can you appreciate the situation – did it show or teach you anything? Can you appreciate how your brain is trying to help, even when it generates negative thoughts?

Observe when you are not accepting.

Look for signs of resisting reality. This could include resentment, bitterness, grudges, anger, annoyance and rumination. It can include thoughts such as “this isn’t fair, why me, I can’t stand this, it shouldn’t be this way”. It often shows up in ‘should statements’ such as “I should be stronger; I shouldn’t be feeling this way”. It can be experienced as denial, avoidance, minimization, or judgement. Non-acceptance may show up as muscle tension, fatigue, insomnia, appetite changes or pain.

Consider your circles of control.

Think about and write down which situations, people, places and internal experiences are within your circle of concern – things that concern and impact you but are completely outside of your personal control. You can practice radically accepting everything in your circle of concern. Then, consider which things are within your circle of influence – situations, people, places and internal experiences that you have some control of but not total control. Lastly, consider which things are inside your circle of control where you can directly control or impact things through your thoughts, words and actions. Try refocusing on the things within your personal control when you’re overwhelmed by things that are outside of your control.

Live by Your Values

Ask yourself: “What kind of PSP, parent, partner, friend, family member, or teammate do I want to be?” Setting the intention to act on your values helps re-direct your attention and energy from resisting reality to aligning your actions to a deeper sense of meaning and purpose. For example, do you want to be someone who is kind, compassionate, assertive, honest, fair, playful, humorous, fit or perseverant? Can you use these values as a compass to guide your actions even when emotions and situations are challenging?

As a PSP you may deal with some of life’s hardest moments — not just in the field, but in your own heart and mind. Acceptance isn’t about giving up or lowering your standards. It’s about facing reality head-on, with courage and compassion, so you can thrive in both your work and your personal life.

By accepting what you cannot control and focusing on what you can, you build the resilience to keep showing up — not just for others, but for yourself.

Support and Resources

Books

The Happiness Trap by Dr. Russ Harris – An accessible introduction to Acceptance and Commitment Therapy

Radical Acceptance: Embracing your life with the heart of a buddha by Tara Brach, Ph.D.

Get out of your mind and into your life: The new Acceptance & Commitment Therapy by Steven C. Hayes.

Mental Health Support & Resources

PSP Net supports the mental health and wellbeing of PSP and their families - PSPNET | Home

First Responder Support Network – Peer support, retreats, and training: www.frsn.org

Code Green Campaign – Mental health resources and education for first responders: www.codegreencampaign.org

References

Baer, R. A., & Huss, D. B. (2004.). “Mindfulness and Acceptance-Based Therapy” in Twenty First Century Psychotherapies. John Wiley & Sons.

Ciesla, J. A., Reilly, L. C., Dickson, K. S., Emanuel, A. S., & Updegraff, J. A. (2012). Dispositional Mindfulness Moderates the Effects of Stress Among Adolescents: Rumination as a Mediator. Journal of Clinical Child & Adolescent Psychology, 41(6), 760–770. https://doi.org/10.1080/15374416.2012.698724

Covey, S. R., Covey, S., & Collins, J. C. (2023). The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change. Blackstone Publishing.

Gross, J. J., & Levenson, R. W. (1993). Emotional suppression: Physiology, self-report, and expressive behavior. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 64(6), 970–986. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.64.6.970

Hayes, S. C., Strosahl, K. D., & Wilson, K. G. (2016). Acceptance and Commitment Therapy: The Process and Practice of Mindful Change.

Harris, R. (2008). The Happiness Trap: How to Stop Struggling and Start Living.

Levin, M. E., Hildebrandt, M. J., Lillis, J., & Hayes, S. C. (2012). The impact of treatment components suggested by the psychological flexibility model: A meta-analysis of laboratory-based component studies. Behavior Therapy, 43(4), 741–756.

Richards, J. M., & Gross, J. J. (2000). Emotion regulation and memory: The cognitive costs of keeping one's cool. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 79(3), 410–424. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.79.3.410