Helping Grieving Employees

Losing a loved one—whether a spouse, child, family member, coworker, or friend—is never easy. Grieving, the process of adjusting to the loss, can bring about substantial and sometimes delayed reactions. In the workplace, recognizing these reactions is essential so that managers and colleagues can provide meaningful support.

Grief is a natural response to loss, and its duration and intensity vary depending on the individual, their relationship with the deceased, and the circumstances of the loss. Mourning involves accepting that the person is gone and gradually learning to live with their memory.

While grief is unique to each person, many experience stages such as denial, anger, disorganization, and reorganization. During this time, employees may struggle with sadness, difficulty concentrating, forgetfulness, irritability, impatience, guilt, or feelings of helplessness. The intensity of grief often subsides over time, but significant dates—such as birthdays, anniversaries, or holidays—may rekindle feelings of loss. Some individuals find closure within months, while for others, grief can last years before a new sense of stability is reached.

Being Sensitive to Cultural Differences

Modern workplaces bring together individuals from diverse cultural and religious backgrounds. Each culture holds unique beliefs about life, death, and mourning. Understanding and respecting these differences can prevent misunderstandings and foster a supportive work environment.

Cultural beliefs may influence how individuals view death, the afterlife, and grieving rituals. Some traditions perceive life as cyclical, believing in reincarnation, while others see death as a transition where the deceased continues to watch over their loved ones. Rituals such as funeral ceremonies, mourning periods, or communal gatherings help individuals process loss and receive support.

Employees may grieve in ways that differ from cultural norms. Some may express little outward emotion, while others may show deep despair. Neither response is wrong—allowing each individual space to grieve in a way that feels right for them is essential.

Supporting a Grieving Colleague

Consider the following when offering support:

• Understand cultural beliefs surrounding death. Respect different mourning customs and traditions.

• Recognize typical grieving behaviours. Be aware that emotional expressions vary across cultures.

• Be mindful of ceremonies and expectations. Different cultures have specific customs regarding who attends funerals and how mourners should behave.

• Respect privacy and communication preferences. Some employees may want minimal details shared, while others may be open to discussing their loss.

• Be aware of appropriate condolences. Some cultures have specific ways of offering sympathy—when in doubt, a simple and heartfelt expression of support is best.

If unsure, consult a colleague familiar with the employee’s cultural background or do a quick online search. Sensitivity to these differences helps create a compassionate and inclusive workplace.

How You Can Help

If an employee shows signs of grief—either by openly discussing it or displaying changes in behaviour—consider the following strategies to provide support:

• Respect their privacy. Ask how they would like their absence communicated to colleagues. They may prefer a simple message (e.g., “Tiva has had a loss in their family and will be away for the next week”) or may want funeral details shared.

• Avoid contacting them during their bereavement leave. Be especially mindful of work-related messages during funeral services or immediately after the loss.

• Offer ongoing support when they return. Grief does not end with bereavement leave. Simple check-ins like “How are you feeling today?” can make a difference.

• Recognize indirect effects of grief. Some employees may not have had a direct connection with the deceased but may still be deeply affected. A recent loss can also trigger unresolved grief from past experiences.

• Be patient. Do not expect the employee to “move on” quickly. Showing frustration or pushing for normalcy can prolong the grieving process.

• Use thoughtful language. Avoid clichés like “I know how you feel,” “It was meant to be,” or “At least they are at peace.” These statements, though well-intentioned, can seem dismissive of the person’s grief.

Recognizing When Additional Support Is Needed

Grief affects everyone differently, and some employees may struggle more than others. Be on the lookout for prolonged signs of distress, such as:

• Persistent low morale or lack of motivation

• Difficulty concentrating or completing tasks

• Increased absenteeism or fatigue

• Withdrawal from colleagues or workplace activities

If these signs persist, encourage the employee to seek additional support, such as an Employee Assistance Program (EAP) or other professional resources.

Supporting Employees Through Grief with Compassion

Creating a supportive work environment for grieving employees requires empathy, patience, and cultural awareness. Recognizing grief as a deeply personal process and offering appropriate support can help employees navigate their loss while maintaining a sense of workplace belonging.

References

1. LivingMyCulture (2019). “Understanding Cultural Approaches to Grief.” Accessed 20 March 2025.